Tim Butler

Counselor, Life Coach & Speaker

Why Is Life So Hard Sometimes?

Ever feel like you are repeating the same actions day after day and getting the same results? We all do at some time in our lives. We all have the ability to find out what does not work, and keep doing it. You are not alone. However, maybe that’s not necessarily a group that you want to be a part of? Maybe you want to break out of the rut you find yourself in, and do something different? Maybe you are ready to stop blaming others for your current emotional distress, and start taking ownership? Here are some action steps to guide you in the process:

1) Acknowledge your reality

A great prophet once said that if you “know the truth, the truth will set you free”. Living in light of your current reality is the first step to improved emotional, physical, and spiritual health. We cannot run a race in life without first knowing where the starting line is. Where is your starting line? Where do you stand right now? Not where do you wish you would be, that is step two. Take inventory of your current state of affairs—include all the details. Ask close friends to give you objective and honest feedback to your reality. Put it down on paper if that helps you acknowledge it better. Get a firm grip on your current reality.

2) Determine where you want to be

The only person you can control is you. As much as you would like to try and control other adults in your life, you are probably ready to acknowledge that those efforts are overrated. (This of course does not apply to parenting our children; that is a different topic, since we are given the charge to bring them up in the direction we feel they should be heading.) So, just as you have determined the starting line, determine the finish line—at least as you have vision for it now. Start with the end in view. Where do you want to be emotionally, physically, and spiritually? Again, putting these target point(s) down on paper can be a great way to solidify the process. Keep this step simple and doable. Set yourself up to win.

3) Put together a plan of action

Deciding a road map from the starting line to the finish line can include many small decisions. Keeping the map realistic, and time-sensitive can be helpful. It is good to be both optimistic, and, realistic in your plans. What do you need to do differently to get out of your current situation and headed towards your goal(s)? We can all be blinded to our possibilities so sometimes this step is aided by the objectivity of friends or professionals. What is within your ability to change/modify/eliminate, and what is not? As the old, but wise saying goes, the road to your success begins with one small step. Take that step and feel empowered to take the next, and next, and…